Never feed a troll unless you are really bored

March 15, 2009 at 11:26 pm | Posted in Thoughts | 15 Comments
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Thats right, Im talking to you, you!

That's right, I'm talking to you, you!

Well, well- interesting things have been afoot, that’s for sure. Lizbeth told me while walking to the train station that Wei Shin had posted a miniature rant on his blog against lousy translators- some Taiwanese person(s) who translated Tom Clancy‘s Splinter Cell into Cell Splinter. Or was it Splitter?

Temperature there rose by several degrees following comments on the post by three guys going by the name of Boon Hwee, Yuen, and Roger. All brought forth multiple arguments- some told him not to complain about other’s subpar translation when his own English isn’t grammatically sublime, and another managed to come up with a rather amusing argument that Wei was racist in slamming the Chinese for their lousy translation.

Note on the latter argument: I don’t really mind typos and other linguistic errors when they are committed on an international level on something that I have no interest in- actually, they provide for interesting entertainment. Which is why I was rather disappointed when the Chinese authorities decided to educate the populace on the proper use of the Imperial tongue for the Beijing Olympics.

Meanwhile, Josiah (I don’t believe I’ve mentioned him here before, but he’s one of my ex-classmates from Brickfields) read Wei’s blog and was provoked to post a rant himself. I do believe that the aforementioned trinity chastised him for that too, although I’m not very sure- it’s not easy making sense of things when you have to sift through three blogs with varying layouts.

Three blogs, I said- the third being Lizbeth’s. She found the whole fracas interesting and pasted an extract of it on hers, with a short commentary. She told me that one of the commentators called her ‘immoral’ or something like that- and then realised that she didn’t really do anything dastardly wrong and apologised in the next comment. I wonder why he typed ‘morale’ instead of ‘moral’, though…

Lizbeth mentioned something to me on the train- one of the trinity, Boon Hwee, had said on Wei’s blog that he’d

‘Stumbled upon ur site through StumbleUpon’

I think the counter-trinity of Lizbeth, Josiah and Wei had no idea what StumbleUpon was, and thought that this Boon Swee was trying to be sarcastic/ironic/whatever, but that he’d failed miserably- I thought so too when she told me about it, although once I read the comment and saw the way it was written, I realized that it was probably one of those blog surfing sites. Which is a pity, because as the counter-trinity thought it was an insult, I generously devised a better one:

‘Hi there, I was searching through some trash and porn sites when I found your blog’

Much better. Too bad it doesn’t serve any purpose now- not that I was going to use it, mind you.

Oh well. Enough attention to unimportant… noise. Judging from the length of Boon Swee’s comment (The other two seem to be limited to the chatbox), I do believer that Wei has been had an encouter with a troll. Not only that, he was trolled, too. Now I don’t mean a troll in the ordinary sense- not those big, retarded, violent creatures, but this:

From Wikipedia: An Internet troll, or simply troll in Internet slang, is someone who posts controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum or chat room, with the intention of provoking other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion.

Judging from the response generated by the counter-trinity, the troll has succeeded. Let’s dissect that: Controversial, inflammatory? Most definitely- Wei was provoked into defending himself, Josiah into defending his pal, and Lizbeth into… getting interested. Intention to provoke an emotional response? Settled. Troll you be, and no, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the last three words preceding this sentence, in case they decide to stroll over and diss my English.

Hey, that could even be a crime! Here’s the fictional Troll Act 2009- Section 1 provides for the mens rea and the actus reus, the actus reus being ‘posting controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant or off-topic messages in an online community‘, and the mens rea ‘intention of provoking other users into an emotional response or to generally disrupt normal on-topic discussion‘. I take it that this is a specific intent crime, as recklessness isn’t an allowable mens rea. What should the penalty be for such a crime, I wonder?

The answer to the previous question: deafening silence. Don’t gratify a troll with a single word, not even with a ‘you blithering clod’, no matter how great the temptation may be. Don’t even bother with the standard online response of ‘lol fail troll is fail‘ (etc). On the other hand, you could always reply, to no one in particular, I might add, ‘Oh dear, I do believe that it will rain tonight’, or some stereotypical English comment on the weather.

There you have it, an educational commentary on how to deal with trolls, if they ever deign to grace your site. How nice- all I get is spam. Here are the posts in question from the counter-trinity:

1)The one that started it all: Of Movies and Games

2)Followed by a riposte, along with a reproduction of the chatbox war on lazy to think of a user name by Josiah, apparently he was also too lazy to use a proper skin- as such, search for the post entitled ‘People never learn‘.

3)Copy and paste session here with Lizbeth. This one provoked a sharp rebuke from… Roger, I think: Brats

4)The post after that on Lizbeth’s blog- no title as of time of writing. Dated March 14, Saturday.

5)Reply from Wei Shin to the trinity: ‘Dear Boon Hwee, Roger, Yuen’

6)A final response from Mr. Roger- he’s ending it: Sunday Outing.=)

And that’s it. It’s been fun- nite, y’all:)
P.S: To the trinity, thanks for all the fun- I gained much fodder for this post thanks to your little altercation. I hope to hear from all of you. But I won’t be paying much attention *grins*

P.S.S: This post was also mentioned here on Dealing with Trolls, shortly after this post was made public.



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  1. cool =)

  2. It was the wee hours in the morning
    and connection was pretty bad to utopia..
    So yeah i guess i was bored..

    but you’re right.. a deafening silence should be the reply (=

  3. oh wait you meant template not my skin..
    haha im actually waiting for my friend to be done with my new header..
    and ill be returning to the basic template/skin (=

    as of now..there is no link to posts in my blog XD
    but they can look for it under March in archivez ^^

    • Archives? Didn’t notice that^^;;
      Interesting name for your blog though…
      It works well both ways(lazy/creative in naming):3

  4. hehe was my name since xanga…long time ago..
    just coudlnt think a url for my blog then ..

    btw mind if i link ya up? (=

    • Sure thing- will link you back too(:

  5. very interesting post. Honestly, I did not bother too much about the issue until I saw yours. Still have the interesting style and language of writing dude.

    Eh wait. Sorry ah. I don’t mean to criticise anyone’s grammatical or structure. I just came coincidently and just note you that you’re still very interesting. haha.

    I am not good in my own English. Haha. What to comment. LOL. How’re you btw? Bugger your book still with me.

    • Thanks- try your hand at it, so everyone links to the previous post on the subject… your turn now(:
      And I think ‘interesting style and language of writing’ is a compliment^^;;
      As for my book… how bout you pass it to Wei Shin? Then ask him to pass it to Elizabeth.

  6. haha linked..

    btw did you mod that pic of Uncle SAM? =p

    • Nope- stole it from someone’s response to a pro troll on

  7. oh lawl =X , perhaps we had bloody satisfied the test in R v Duffy =x

    • Duffy… I don’t remember anything about that case^^;;

  8. Normally, I’d simply delete trolling comments, but recently, I feel like wanting to substitute any encountered trolling comments with that famous Linkin Park song: CRAWLING IN MY SKIN, THESE WOUNDS THEY WILL NOT HEAL. Oh man, I’m a frickin’ genius.

    • That would certainly be most annoying. Your site might begin to look a little morbid though… how about the theme song for Barney instead? That purple dinosaur…^^;;

  9. After reading the article, I just feel that I need more info. Could you share some resources ?

    Author’s reply:

    Can’t decide if this comment is spam or not. It looks like it, but it wasn’t sent to the spam folder… sorry if I’m wrong.

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